Two of the Same
by Eveilae
Summary: Sisters shouldn't feel like this. The separation should have made the feelings go away, right? Or maybe absence makes the heart grow fonder. Goddam it. [KARINYUZU]


**_I do not own Bleach._**

**Alright, this is SHOJO-AI / YURI and INCEST. Both extremely rare in the Bleach fandom. I mean, Bya & Rukia are the only things closest to incest, I've ever seen. I've been a Karin/Yuzu fan from the start, but I've never written anything until now. **

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**TWO OF THE SAME  
Similarity**

_Ever fallen in love, in love with someone you shouldn't've fallen in love with?  
_-The Buzzcocks

Karin ripped open the top of the small packet of sugar and poured it onto to the table, positioning it all into one smooth pile. It was like cocaine, and she imagined for a second that it was, and there was a little—

"Karin-nee?" The dark-haired woman looked up in surprise, her eyes searching and confused for a little bit before settling comfortably on the arrival's face. It was round, but not pudgy, and slightly different from how Karin had last seen it years before when the two of them had gone their separate ways. She was wearing a plain blue jumper, with her hair still cut short around her face and slight vestiges of makeup on her face. Without meaning to, a smile slipped onto Karin's face.

Yuzu had always had that effect on Karin, even now, when Karin was much harder to please than as a child and her face had grown as chiseled and stony as her brother's.

"Hey," she greeted casually, and brushed the pile of sugar off the table with a quick flick of her hand. "Ya look good." Two seconds into their conversation and they'd already exhausted all their possible responses.

Yuzu sat down in the chair across from her sister, and smiled a thin, but wholehearted smile. "Thanks. I . . . I actually spent nearly an hour in front of the closet trying to pick out what to wear," she said, sounding embarrassed.

But Karin only smiled her usual grin; the real one, not the kind she pasted on out of necessity. "That's alright," she replied easily. "You didn't hafta impress me, y'know. I like you however you are."

The blush that colored Yuzu's cheeks suddenly seemed out place. They were sisters and they should've been able to take compliments with a smile and a thank you. But there was a _reason_ that the two of them hadn't talked for ages. Yuzu hadn't been able to forget things Karin had begged her for. Her innocence gone, she hadn't known how to act in front of her sister. Yuzu had hated the broken shards of their relationship, and that's why—

"I didn't mean it like that," Karin added quickly, waving her hands in front of her face.

Yuzu's eyes widened in surprise. Had her emotions been so plain? Well, then again, this was _Karin. _She'd always know her better than anyone, so why had Yuzu thought that just because they'd been apart for a while that bond would've broken? "I . . .I know," she replied softly. Too softly, and her words were drowned out by the footsteps and greeting of the waitress. Yuzu decided not to repeat herself and instead tried to lessen the throbbing in her temples by massaging them. Her eyes closed briefly and she frowned. It just wouldn't recede.

Was this headache nervousness?

"May I take your order?" the woman asked, but her tone was more playful than appropriate and Yuzu's eyes flew open. She was a tall woman, her hair spit down the middle and falling smoothly over her shoulders like oil. Her lips were curvy and sexy, and though the rest of her face was nothing special to look at, Yuzu knew those lips were the clincher.

Karin had a thing for lips.

"Fuck you, Sunako," Karin answered with a laugh, and her foot moved from underneath the table to aim a kick at the waitress's own. This Sunako moved out of the way in time for Karin's attack to miss, and stuck out her thin tongue from in between those lips.

"What, I can't be polite? I mean, I wanna make a good impression in front of your sister, after all." With this Sunako glanced over at Yuzu almost shyly, her dark eyes studying her openly. Then, as if suddenly remembering her recent statement, she tucked the menus under her arm and stuck out the opposite hand for Yuzu to shake. "My bad. I'm Ukai Sunako, and I'm a—" There was a short pause and a subtle glance back at Karin then, who was looking on with a mix of curiosity and amusement. " –good friend of Karin's."

"She's my ex," Karin corrected, leaning over the edge of the table slightly. She didn't want to sugarcoat anything with Yuzu; she'd never had to before. Anyway, Karin knew from experience that Yuzu resented being shielded, and her twin knew that this was something she needed to be aware of.

"Erm, yeah . . ." Sunako said, blushing and refusing to look Yuzu in the eye. Karin had to stifle a laugh at this. Outspoken Sunako, blushing? She'd only ever done that during sex before . . . "_She_ broke up with _me_, by the way."

"We weren't any good for each other," Karin finished quickly, and pulled the menus from her gently, trying to seem uninterested while she was actually trying to tell whether or not Yuzu was disgusted or taking this well.

Yuzu didn't notice Karin's glances as her gaze was still locked on the waitress/ex-girlfriend/ex-lover. So she'd been right. Still, it was a shock to hear it slip so easily from Karin's lips, like it was nothing. "I'd like a coffee, please," she answered at last, without even taking the menu Sunako offers her. "Black."

Was this hot flame jealousy? Yuzu felt too plain in her jumper and petit appearance and high voice, completely contrasting Sunako's broad shoulders and thick curves and that raspy voice that probably sent shivers up Karin's spine. Her only comfort was that she knew she had a mouth at least as attractive as this other woman did. Yuzu ran a finger over these selfsame lips, as if to reassure herself that they hadn't disappeared suddenly.

"So, heard from Ichigo lately?" Karin asked after Sunako had taken her order and fled with a vague farewell. Neither of them wanted to discuss the awkward situation Sunako had brought and taken with her.

"Yes, he sends me letters every so often. He's still off doing those shinigami things. It's a little scary to think about it, since . . . well, what if he _dies_?" Yuzu grips her knees tightly underneath the table, but her eyes were steady on Karin's stoic face.

"Rukia or Renji would definitely tell us if he died," Karin replied simply, brushing off that Yuzu's words had had a different meaning. Karin's eyes flicked nervously towards the window, the door. This was harder than Karin had thought it would be.

"And . . . what about Daddy? Does he—" Yuzu understood Karin's reaction, and for this the dark-haired woman was grateful. She really wasn't one for opening up, and she wasn't one for useless what-ifs. Plus, she knew better than to doubt Ichigo, who'd proven himself to be worthy of their trust and much more. He was too reliable to die.

But Isshin, on the other hand, was anything but reliable. Karin never knew when he'd call up or what he'd say. Or whether it would even be him. She always half-expected it to be a mourning neighbor, announcing his death. That would be just like her father, to thoughtlessly follow his love into the skies. Or was their mother even up there? Matters of Seireitei had never been very clear to Karin.

"He called last week. Wanted to know if I was gettin' married. Apparently, he had a dream where I called him ta tell him I'd found a husband, but he was . . . a zombie or something. And then he beat the zombie up and I told I-Dad I loved him." By this time Yuzu was laughing outright, which had been Karin's plan from the beginning. She'd needed to see Yuzu show _some_ kind of emotion or she'd explode.

Isshin _had_ said all that shit, though.

A different waitress came by with a tray. On it was balanced a mug of coffee and a large sub, the lettuce and tomatoes spilling from the sides. Karin snatched the sandwich off it hungrily and grinned up at the stranger wolfishly. "'Suki, tell Sunako she's a wimp. From me with love, yeah?"

"With pleasure. She pract'ally pissed 'er pants out 'ere," the plump woman replied with a derisive snort and bounce as she pulled her shirt down to cover some exposed skin and show some more of her excessive cleavage. She sent a polite, but gracious, smile in Yuzu's direction before setting off towards the back.

Before Yuzu could ask, Karin began explaining quickly. "Y'see, Sunako didn't know what ta expect from you at all, an' she _is_ really my best friend more than anythin' else, even if . . . yeah . . . she didn't know _I'm_ the protective one in this duo."

Yuzu didn't respond, but just kept her gaze downcast, studying the cracks in the wooden table as her small hands gripped the mug tightly. She could feel the heat through the ceramic and it hurt, but Yuzu didn't want to let go. The thought that Karin had . . .

"Wanna get outta here?"

"Definitely."

_Mother, mother may I cry?  
__Father, will you teach me how to die the right way some day?  
__I don't want a second chance to turn my stuttering reluctance into romance.  
_-The Weakerthans

Karin's life seemed so nice, Yuzu thought as they strolled through the small park mere blocks away from Karin's small apartment. She had friends in her very apartment building, and places to visit and a park so nearby. . . A small breeze blew past, wafting the smell of the trees and wet grass in their direction. Yuzu took a huge whiff of it, loving the contrast between this and the smog-city she lived in.

"Karin, I can't believe you haven't invited me here _before_," Yuzu told her sister teasingly, nudging the taller woman with her elbow and taking a small peak at her from the corner of her eye.

Karin didn't look like she was enjoying herself very much, Yuzu noticed with a jolt. Her hands stuffed deep inside the pockets of her loose, worn jeans, and her jean-clad shoulders slumped over. Her hair hung over her face like a mask, but Yuzu could guess at the expression behind that black curtain. She was the very image of a grumpy Ichigo, Yuzu thought to herself with a silent chuckle.

"I thought you'd say no."

This surprised Yuzu with its suddenness; a voice from behind a wall. "Why would I have said no?" she asked, perplexed.

Karin slipped a hand out of a pocket to push some of the thick black hair back behind her ear. "'Cause I kissed you, and I don't regret it." Karin was blunt, but still, Yuzu hadn't expected it to come out like that. It was subject they'd been swerving past, but now Karin had slammed into it like a bike crashing into a tow-truck.

Yuzu turned her face and wished she had hair like Karin, so that she could cover the light blush that was coloring her cheeks. "You did more than _kiss_ me, Karin-nee," she answered, avoiding the unspoken question.

But Karin wasn't about to let her get away with that. She grabbed Yuzu by the shoulders and turned Yuzu to face her. She looked so determined, so hurt, so resolved to face whatever would happen with strength. "Do you hate me, Yuzu?"

Yuzu tried to copy Karin, tried to steady herself, tried to make her voice sound sure. "Do you think I'd be here if I did, Karin?" She failed. Her voice trembled and she felt the tears well up in her eyes.

But Karin wasn't done. She couldn't stand to see Yuzu look so vulnerable and her sisterly instincts kicked in. She lifted a long finger and wiped away the tears gently. She knew she was overstepping the bounds again, but this was Yuzu.

Karin hadn't been lying when she'd said that she'd broken up with Sunako because they just hadn't worked. People assumed that Karin was attracted to people like her; to brusque, outspoken, violent people who talked with what they did instead of with words. No. For Karin it had always been opposites attract. Yuzu was soft and gentle and everything Karin could never be. She had to protect that, because the world could turn Yuzu into _her_. It'd already bitten Ichigo and her, but it wouldn't touch the best of them.

And when Karin leaned over to kiss her wet cheeks, Yuzu felt a shiver run down her spine. It wasn't wholly unpleasant, just . . . surprising. It felt different here; where no one knew they were sisters and that what they were doing was wrong. Yuzu could imagine for a little while that this wasn't taboo; that it was just . . .

Yuzu shifted slightly, tilting her head upwards and meeting Karin's lips lightly with her own. It was an electric shock, and Yuzu knew that her sister was feeling it too. It was going back and forth, from their lips to Karin's fingers, down Yuzu's arms and slithering past Karin's hips where the smaller woman had placed her hands.

But Karin pulled away suddenly, the connection broken and leaving them incomplete. Karin was surprised to see Yuzu so calm, perhaps a little flushed if anything. "No . . . you don't want this, Yuzu," she muttered, roughly shoving a hand through her hair. Her twin had always been indulging, especially when it came to Karin. She used to make her favorite foods more than those of any of the others, and let her pick what CD to put in the stereo when they were home alone.

But still, Karin couldn't stop shaking. She needed a cigarette, badly.

Yuzu reaching out towards her once more didn't help at all. Karin jumped back, squawking loudly in her surprise. "Stop it! I don't want to see you hurt 'cause you want me to be happy, Yuzu!" Her calves slammed into the bench behind her and she plopped down on it, her ass and legs throbbing.

The younger twin only smiled that gentle smile, and slipped beside Karin. "Karin-nee, I'm not the same little sister that ran away because I was scared. I think it's time you stopped protecting me and let me make my own decisions, okay?" And she pulled Karin forward by the collar, and their lips met awkwardly once more.

Once more. With feeling.

And Karin didn't move away, but let Yuzu take control, maybe for the first time. And when Yuzu stood up and offered her a hand, Karin took it without a word.

Maybe they weren't as opposite as Karin remembered.

_I have a love and it's all that I have.  
__Right or wrong, what else can I do?  
_-West Side Story


End file.
